Episode 7 starts with some great aerial shots of St Croix. I love Sean talking about being a "rule breaker". He is such a sissy. Nice subtle product placement for the Buccaneer Hotel. Tierra keeps the anti-social thing going on, setting up her own personal room. She always looks like one of those bitter beer face commercials whenever she is around the other women. Tierra brings out some ageist remarks against Ashlee which are NOT going to play well at the reunion show. The date starts out with a swim to the catamaran and upon getting a closer look at AshLee she appears to have gone under the knife. AshLee is a crier. Her and Sean have a heart to heart that ends with them laying in the surf making out. NOT as fun as it sounds. You get sand in your crotch.
Do you think they have to use special camera angles to cover up erections? Just a thought.
Back at the ranch, Tierra gets her first one on one date and proceeds to bitch and moan about it. Lesley is setting herself up nicely for the next Bachelorette, calling it like she sees it: "I hate that bitch". Also, where is the white wine for their dinner? They are on a island, and you know fish is going to be on the menu. Just mystifying that he would only offer red wine or champagne. AshLee builds up to drop a bomb on Sean, and the bomb is she got married 15 years before (1997/8 if anyone is counting). You think their first dance was to Usher or Next? I can't think of a much more romantic wedding song than "Nice and Slow", unless it's "Too Close". AshLee must have been channeling the College of Cardinals when she acclaimed her love for Sean.
Sean and Tierra have their one on one date, a walkabout of St. Croix. The producers must have cut out all of her previous date whining, cause she comes off like a huge baby. An impromptu parade shows up out of nowhere and Sean is looking to replace the legendary Jake Pavelka when it comes to dancing. Tierra has put on her happy face, basically confirming our suspicions that she is bi-polar, blaming the girls because they don't like her. At dinner, Tierra tries to force Sean's hand and say he was acting distant, but he does not bite.
Catherine, Desiree, and Lindsey have the 3rd date with Sean and I was half expecting Lindsey to mangle the word horizon. Every time she talks it is high comedy.
Sean shows up at the house early in the morning with a camera, trying to see what they look like without makeup. Much respect from one Sean to another: most of your life you aren't going to see your wife wearing makeup. A good idea to do this before you propose.
More Jeep product placement. He is such a Jeep dude. I love the Bachelor. Nothing like watching the sunrise and drinking a mimosa!! Alcohol makes everything better. Smart of the producers to encourage Sean drinking and driving as well. That must have been a shitty road trip. St Croix is 30 miles long. More drinking at the cafe and then a trip to the tree house. Desiree was probably thinking about moving in. Beach time means some running in the sand and shirt off. Sean's physique has taken a toll from all of the drinking and eating and his six pack is slowly vanishing. A taste of things to come, ladies. Catherine drops another stunner on Sean on the date, talking about her father. She has had quite the traumatic life, and Sean is going to eat it up.
Desiree gets some alone time with Sean and she can not hold the tears back. Girls are bringing out their big guns. Sean throws a curve ball and gives the rose to Lindsay. Did anyone see that coming? I mean, really? The other girls cry and his response is to kick sand in their faces. If he picks Lindsay, I give up. Shelley was right; look upon my works and despair.
Lesley is telling it straight and if she doesn't end up with Sean, I would hope she is going to be the next Bachelorette, but she is way too smart for that I think. Lesley can't seem to spit it out what she has to say to Sean and you have to wonder if that's going to come back and bite her in the ass. Fruit picking appears to be the extent of the date and there is no dinner. How bizarre. Sean's sister shows up and dispenses some hard truths. Shay brings out the lesson learned from the Courtney incident: don't end up with a girl that nobody likes.
Back at the ranch, the looming showdown between Tierra and AshLee explodes. AshLee does not back down from Tierra and Tierra pulls out the age card. Tierra is ridiculous; "men love me". I can not wait for the reunion show. Tierra drops some unintentional comedy, talking about how she can't control her eyebrow. Sean walks in right after the battle royale has ended, and Tierra is BALLIN' out of control. She lays the guilt trip on thick, flat out lying about not confronting others and not getting emotional. It must have been opposite day on St Croix. Sean talks about how much he cares about Tierra and then says she should go home now. Good riddance to bad rubbish. His sister would have given her the boot anyways. Sean is taking this Bachelor shit way too serious. This show is a stepping board to The Bachelor Pad, being on the sidebar of US Weekly and D list celebrity status. You aren't supposed to actually marry the person you end up with. Tierra talks about being strong and getting through it. This will not end well, if you remember her freak out when she found out it was Sean. In 6 months she'll be sending him DM's on Twitter and trying to grow him in a lab from saliva she saved. Also, do you think sparkle means virginity? Or at least anal virginity?
The final cocktail party begins with Sean telling the women that Tierra went home and that the cocktail party is cancelled. Alcohol budget must have been spiraling out of control. Chris Harrison finally makes his appearance, announcing what we already know that someone is going home. Des gets the first rose. No surprise. Catherine gets the next rose and Chris Harrison, master of the obvious, comes out to tell us this is the last rose. AshLee in a little bit of a shocker gets the final rose. Lesley and Sean just were not clicking on their date and she did not open up to him on their date, but I feel like she was finally opening up to being on the show and liked it.
Next week looks awesome, where we finally get an aggressive sibling who calls out the whole bachelor farce for what it is. Big time. My early predictions: AshLee wins the show; Sean won't be able to deal with Catherine not having a dad around and having to ask women for permission. He is way too old fashioned for that. Desiree's brother flipping out is going to make him sour on her, and Lindsay's army dad is going to shoot shit straight, explaining how they dropped her on her head as a child and she has never been the same since. I mean, her dad runs an army base and the best job she can get is a substitute teacher on this base? Something stinks. So basically, by default, AshLee has to be the front-runner
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
I'm finally 100% caught up on the Bachelor. I also have a ridiculous lead in Fantasy Bachelor of 400ish to 170ish. I have had basically the Dream Team of Fantasy Bachelor anchored Lindsay (my first pick and who is awesome, loves to make out and is drunk all the time), Sarah, AshLee, Lesley and Tierra. I might just be too good for this game just like in Fantasy Baseball.
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to Tierra, she was horrible. One of the worst contestants ever. While Courtney was smart, crafty and manipulative. Tierra was needy, dumb and just cried all the time. She was probably one of the least well-spoken women on the show. She also used the death of a past boyfriend to get closer to Sean. Using personal loss for personal gains pisses me off beyond belief. Somehow Sean fell for her. I guess the dude just likes criers. He was giving out roses to criers left and right. If I was the Bachelor I would have a strict no crying rule that I would tell the women right away. If you cry, then you leave. I'd also be the most hate bachelor ever but that's a whole different story. But really I think you downplay the sister's roll in his decision. I think off camera big sis yelled out Sean and said under no circumstances could he pick another "Courtney." Of course Sean was going to listen to big sis, the dude can't even make the first move on these women throwing themselves at him. His move basically involves saying "Oh, I want to kiss you" followed by him waiting to be kissed. Without big Sis intervention, Sean definitely leaves Tierra on. Thank you big sis.
Random stuff, AshLee and her husband probably danced to some My Pony by Genuine. For such a big reveal, I thought it was pretty lame. Getting married and divorced before the age of 18 doesn't even count as getting married in my book. When it comes to Lesley, there was no way she was going to win. Smart girls don't win the Bachelor. The Bachelor's can't handle smart girls. I mean Sean's eyes lit up when Des was talking about how she wanted a man to take care of her. That's such nonsense. Last I checked it was 2013.
I agree next week looks so awesome. But you have to keep in mind that the people who make Bachelor promo's are masters at editing. I bet Lindsay's Dad caves and gives Sean permission. Because nothing says true love like making out with tons of chicks at the same time and saying each one is your best friend and is special. If Desiree's brother actually punched Sean, that would be so legit. Catherine isn't a contender at all. I think she's on just to ensure lasting diversity.
Lastly, back to AshLee, wouldn't her winning be one of the biggest upsets ever? She's 32 and she was married! It's sort of like Ray Lewis recovering in time for the Super Bowl. It just shouldn't happen. Maybe they need to test for PEDs on the Bachelor. Or maybe, AshLee really maximizes the 3 hours that she admitted that it takes for her to get ready for a date.
Could not agree more about Tierra. She just was not smart/experienced enough to play the same game as Courtney. I don't know if it was big sis's intervention as much as it was the producers. Ratings and social media chatter are what drives the show, and keeping Tierra on gives them a bad guy (or girl in this instance) for everyone to focus on. You need a villain.
ReplyDeleteAgreed with you about AshLee and her big reveal. Being divorced doesn't really mean anything anymore, especially if you got married during high school as part of a parental rebellion. Sean is old school which is why a girl like Lesley didn't stand a chance. You are right about the editing, but they basically showed nothing from him meeting AshLee's family so maybe that is going to be the ultimate shocker? She will have like 8 adopted siblings or something equally as strange. You are right about Catherine. She flat out admits at the end of the rose ceremony that Lesley should have been kept over her. Not a good sign.
I think you are right, it would be one of the biggest upsets ever if he picked AshLee. He turns 30 in November and she is 32, going on 33. It's amazing that she lasted as long as she did, being so old. It helps that she looks young (and is well put together. I think the only way he ends up with her is if he actually wants to settle down and get married and have kids. You pick Lindsay, Des, or Catherine if you want to live the D list celebrity lifestyle because they are so young that they dont want kids and to be a homebody.
You wanna know why there were no clips from meeting AshLee's family? It's cause she is 32. Her family would approve of any dude she brought home. The dude could be a serial killer and the family would still think "well at least she finally found someone" and "now we don't have to listen to her complain all the time about being alone." There is absolutely no way they won't come out overly nice to Sean, because they don't want to have the wrath of crazy 32 year old coming down on them for ruining her last shot at true love. You'd basically be asking for a death sentence if you weren't really welcoming to Sean. However, when the girl is like Lindsay or Des and in her mid to early 20s the family can still pull out the she's too young and doesn't know what she is doing card, which will always cause drama and interesting TV.
Delete